Monday, July 16, 2012

Learn the rules of the road !!

Tips for driving by John

  1. If you are in the left lane,,,get the fuck out of it if people are passing you on the right !
  2. The steering wheel is not a resting place for food !
  3. Use your fucking turn signals !
  4. Turn signals do not give you the right to change lanes if it is occupied, the turn signal is to let the other drivers know what your intentions are, the other driver must let or give you permission to come over !
  5. The yellow lines are always on the left of you, so if they are on the right your dumb-ass is driving the wrong way !
  6. If pieces of your car are flapping in the wind ...fix it or burn it !
  7. Get the hell off your cell phone !
  8. Drive with respect to/for others !
  9. I like my car so keep your dented piece of shit away from mine in parking lots !
  10. Learn to read/speak English so you know what the fuck the signs say !!!
  11. If you tailgate you will be shot !
  12. Out of state plates are not a reason to drive like a moron, go three lanes over to exit or anything I deem stupid !
Here are a few changes I have made:

Ford Expedition is now a Ford Mexpedition --- the mexicans love the 1999 model
"     " Mextang ---- always have too much crap on it like those glue on fake tear drop vents on the fenders.
                                                                                                                                                                   I am sure I will come up with more soon.

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